Weight: 310
Difference from last entry: – (new starting point)

When you first start losing weight, everything is great. However, you lose weight far too fast to really be able to keep it off. There are a number of factors that might contribute to this. Mine was losing weight through the SlimFast diet. I was shedding pounds at a rate of four or five a week. (Healthy weightloss is between one and two pounds per week).

After the wonderful start and the drastic weight loss, old habits start to creep in. As they do, the person begins to regain the weight. After a certain amount of weight has been regained, the person tries going back to the diet that allowed them to lose weight so quickly before. But this time it is much harder to lose weight.

The person gets discouraged, and reverts back to the old habits. The person’s weight starts going up quickly. The person might try dieting one or two more times, but eventually they give up. More often than not, they weigh more before when they started dieting.

When I first posted the above quote, I never thought that I would be living it again. And yet, that is exactly what I have done. This quote, which I first published in these pages when I started this journal in 1997, could be a script for what I have lived through the last couple of years. This is not a good thing.

I am fairly certain that I have never weighed over 300 pounds in my life. (I can’t be 100 percent sure; there were quite a few years when I refused to go near a scale, for fear of what it would say.) Now I am well above the 300 pound mark. Why? What caused me to gain back not just what I lost, but an extra 15 pounds to go on top of that?

I think I am going to spend the next few weeks trying to determine exactly what caused this slip in my self control. What caused me to give in so completely to my old habits. Every single one of the bad habits I have written about in this journal are back, and back with a vengance. When was it that I completely lost control? That’s another point I’ll be examining in this journal.

It is now time to try to get back into the swing of things. Over the last 18 months or so, I’ve learned that I can’t just blindly jump into a weight management program and expect it to work. I have to do this with both eyes open. I have to prepare myself for this, mentally and physically. This is also a theme that I’ll be examining over the next few weeks in this journal.

This week’s entry is more of a starting point than anything else. I am putting myself on alert; I cannot afford to gain any more weight. I am in prime heart attack shape right now; I don’t want to be a heart attack victim! I need to gain control of my weight, both mentally and physically. I need to stop being such a slave to food. I need to make changes now. Not tomorrow, but now.

As for those of you who still read this journal, first, thank you for not giving up on me! It’s been eight months since the last journal update. I cannot beleive that you still stop by! [grin] Hopefully, you will be able to use what I have done to myself as an example of what NOT to do. And maybe, just maybe, we can start down the road to healthiness together.

Lao Tzu, the man credited with writing the most ancient Taoist text, the Tao Te Ching, writes that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. This journal entry, my friends, is my first step. I am starting down the road of a thousand miles (or, in this case, of 100 pounds). I hope you will join me!

– Miguelito