27 Feb

Exercise!

Those of you unfamiliar with the Weight Watchers program won’t be familiar with the idea of exercise Points. The concept is straight-forward though: physical activities are given a certain number of Points. One’s goal is to get as many activity Points in a week as they can, depending on their fitness level. I had been lucky to get 3-4 Points a week up until recently. For as fat and out-of-shape as I was when I started, I thought that was pretty good.

I’ve slowly been ramping myself up since then. Getting into an exercise routine has helped immensely. In the previous week, I pulled in 8 activity Points. Last week, I broke an all-time personal record for myself by logging 16 activity Points.

So far this week, I have 10!

Yeah, that is good stuff. 🙂

26 Feb

Perceptions revisited

In a previous article, I talked about how people perceive overweight people. In that entry, I said that I was “realizing that someone who sees me for the first time will still see me as a big fat guy.” While this may be true, it is not necessarily the case. I think that this is a much bigger reflection on myself, on how I see myself. When I look in the mirror, I still see the big fat guy. I still see my 330+ pound self, even though I am now much, much thinner. It’s how I see myself. I need to change that.

I’ve always had a poor self-image. This ended up being a self-fulfilling prophecy. I felt like I was horribly fat, and I ended up making myself exactly that way. I spent years and years with nothing but negative thoughts (“who am I trying to fool?” “I’m such a slob.” “Why am I trying? I have no self control!” “I am so fat, I’m just going to keep getting fatter.”). It was easy – far too easy – to let myself start listening to those thoughts. To agree with them, in a way, or tof all under their spell.

That’s a goal I have set in front of myself. I need to stop with the negative self-talk. I need to encourage myself through hard times, not beat myself up over them. I need to acknowledge all of the hard work I’ve done, instead of obsessing over the times that I didn’t do so well.

I need to change the way that I think. Everything else will fall into place once I do.