30 Jul

Weight: 295
Difference from last entry: +3

Hello once again. I hope that you are having a great summer. This has been a great summer so far for me (as you can probably guess, since I got married this summer!). But it has also been a summer of revelations. I am learning some interesting things about myself, and am gaining a little insight into life itself. It is fascinating; I will definitely have to write about it sometime in my Random Thoughts blog. But that’s on a different topic.

As you can see, my weight continues to rise. Once upon a time, this journal was to document how I was doing managing my weight. Now it seems to be documenting how I am holding up as I continue to gain weight back. It is kind of sad, and kind of amazing, to me just how radically things have changed. This is a 180 degree turn around that I was really hoping wouldn’t happen. Life definitely moves in cycles. In all things, it seems.

Lately, I’ve realized something very scary. I am in dangerous shape right now. My weight is definitely effecting my health in a negative way. I am finding myself constantly out of breath from very little exertion. My resting heart rate is much higher than it should be. These symptoms have been occurring for a while now, but I am just really noticing them now. I have just realized that I am 31 years old and in real danger of something bad happening. I need to do whatever possible to get healthy.

My goal is to start walking while at work. I only have a 30 minute lunch break, which makes things kind of challenging. But I am going to find some way to get the exercise in. I managed to walk about a half-mile today; hopefully I can figure out a way to increase this as time goes on.

That’s all for me for now. Have a great week, everyone!

– Miguelito

11 Jul

Weight: 292
Difference from last entry: +/- 0

Hello again, everyone! Obviously, it has been a while since I’ve done an update to this journal. And I had a great reason: I am now a married man! The wedding was absolutely fantastic. It was a wonderful experience, the most wonderful event in my life. All the planning was well worth it.

So now I am back to normal life. I no longer have stress or lack-of-time to blame for my problems maintaining my weight. I now can focus specifically on what it will take to get back on track here. If I don’t get back on track, then I can only point a finger at myself. My health is in my own hands; there’s no way to deny it now.

I was reflecting on what has happened over the last few years, specifically on how I managed to gain all of the weight back that I lost in 1997. I realized something that others who are having success in losing weight may find useful. The biggest mistake I made was in being complacant. There was a point, back when I weighed in under 225 pounds, when I decided to myself, “I’ve done wonderful! I have done a fantastic job. I can now let up, I don’t have to worry too much about anything anymore. Because I have done it, I have lost a lot of weight.” And, after a couple of weeks of thinking this, I actually started to let up. And that is when the weight came back.

Everyone knows the saying, “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.” What I didn’t realize until it was too late is that the price of weight management is also eternal vigilance. For those of us who are overweight, once we start trying to maintain it, we will not reach a point where we can say, “Okay, I am finished.” It just doesn’t work that way for us. Because maintaining our weight does not come naturally for us. We know how to GAIN weight, not how to stay at a steady, healthy weight. If we decide that we can stop worrying about our weight, we will gain whatever we lost back.

This is why I dislike the term “diet”. Diet implies something that is done for a while, until you reach your goal, and then can be stopped. The problem with that is, once a person comes off of their diet, they usually go back to eating the way that they used to. It’s a vicious cycle, one to be avoided.

What I am trying for is a lifestyle change. And those are hard to do. I was successful once; I plan to be successful again.

Cheers, everyone!
– Miguelito